Financial infidelity can be just as damaging as other forms of betrayal in a relationship. Here are some key green flags – signs of healthy financial transparency – and red flags – types of spending that might set off alarm bells.
Green Flags
The secret that isn’t a secret
Some couples have “secret” accounts for personal spending, but as long as both partners are aware and the spending remains consistent, it’s usually harmless.
The odd spending spree
Occasional splurges using a set amount of discretionary money are fine as long as financial goals are established.
Buying something – but then admitting it
Making impulsive purchases isn’t a huge problem if both partners are honest about it and communicate openly.
Struggling to discuss finances
Many couples avoid financial talks, but working with a financial advisor can make these conversations easier.
Knowing when to seek help
Acknowledging financial problems and seeking help can preserve trust in a relationship.
Red Flags
Spending that isn’t accounted for
Unexplained charges, large cash withdrawals, or rising debt could signal compulsive spending, gambling, or financial dishonesty.
Luxe purchases
Buying expensive items without consulting a partner can create resentment and mistrust in a relationship.
Lying about money
Consistently hiding spending, debt, or financial changes is a major red flag for dishonesty.
Banking changes
If financial notifications stop or accounts seem altered, it could indicate an attempt to hide spending or missed payments.
Changes to estate plans
Unexpected adjustments to wills or beneficiaries may signal financial infidelity and should be discussed openly.
